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Local hero Jake Courville (pictured below) benches his ENTIRE fantasy football team for week 7 of the Fantasy Football league with his work buddies for a noble, patriotic cause. Courville thinks that it “just ain’t right” that black footballers are kneeling during the national anthem at the beginning of NFL football games.

“It just ain’t right! American soldiers died for your right to fly that flag high and to sing that national anthem and you’re disrespecting everything that America stands for by kneeling on the grass,” says Courville. “If I protested by kneeling at work every morning, I’d be FIRED!,” he screamed, Confederate flag draped over his right shoulder.

When asked if his garbage truck route would somehow have a problem with him kneeling silently at work, he stated, “They damn well better not! They treated Tim Tebow so unfair and all he did was kneel and pray to GOD!”

Courville stated that during his week 7 Fantasy Football game, he was “Benching all of his players ‘cept Aaron Rodgers” in solidarity with all of America as they boycott the NFL. US President Donald J. Trump stated that all of the NFL players should be fired if they silently kneeled before a game, and Jake Courville agrees with this statement.

When asked if he thought that it was possible that it was about American rights, police brutality against young men of color, etc, he just started screaming about Colin Kaepernick’s afro for some reason. We asked him if he heard that his favorite team, the Green Bay Packers, had suffered the loss of Quarterback Aaron Rodgers due to breaking his collarbone, he being rambling about a conspiracy to add Kaepernick to the Green Bay roster. …ok, dude.

Courville also conceded that he still hasn’t figured out how to use the ESPN Fantasy Football app, but he definitely told his work friend’s at the garbage dump that he was joining and as soon as he downloaded it on his cracked iPhone 4G, he was totally “benching every last damn one of them.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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