Sailors sad to see the USS Kitty Hawk scrapped, but happy that it will be converted into a mega-weapon.
Congress has decided instead of scrapping the USS Kitty Hawk, they will re-purpose the aircraft carrier and convert it into a massive, large-scale assault rifle. Rather than turn it into Coca Cola cans, the mega-weapon could likely be pointed east and fired at countries like North Korea, Russia, or even Texas if it gets out of hand.
The modification is called the AR-63, an ode to the CV-63 warship. Many sailors were taken aback when it was announced that there was no effort to turn the beloved warship into a museum. They donated over a million dollars, which was in turn spent buying property and cheap beer by the owner of the Kitty Hawk Association (probably).
There were rumors that the Kitty Hawk would be pulled out of retirement considering United States President Donald J. Trump wants a bigger Navy, because he’s likely to get us into the nuclear war during his presidency. This was all rumors, lies, smoke, and mirrors. The best thing that we could do, honestly, is simply give it to a foreign power or turn it into a mega-weapon.
With the USS Kitty Hawk and her old age, she catches on fire spontaneously, gives people gastrointestinal viruses, and might go down on a guy at a moments notice, just like your ex-wife.
What do you think? Would the Kitty Hawk be an effect weapon as an AR-63 or should be just use it as a biological weapon due to the asbestos, gastro, etc?
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