America saw democracy in action today as a Cajun family decided not to invite Crazy Aunt Connie to the family crawfish boil. However, all was ruined when Roger’s dumb ass posted photos of the event to social media and Aunt Connie began checking her phone for invite, shows up to party upset and demanding a sausage.
Part of the unspoken rule was to NOT post photos of the Broussard family crawfish boil on social media, which was immediately violated by estranged cousin Roger after having a few too many Natty Lights.
“Are you guys shitting me?” said Crazy Aunt Connie, slamming the door on her PT Cruiser. “I know I paid my phone bill! Y’all can’t bother to invite me!” She said this while digging into the table full of boiled crawfish, immediately taking all of the biggest crawfish for herself and swiping Roger’s tiny andouille.
The family begin whispering, “I knew it. I knew this would happen. This crazy bat always shows up every spring because someone goes off and posts photos on Facebook! She’s such a hoe for crawfish!”
Connie, on everyone’s Facebook friend’s list but unfollowed due to her nonsensical rants on the KATC-TV3 news page, is usually tolerated during the holidays, but she is a real jerk when it comes to crawfish, which aren’t cheap by any means. Cousin ROGER forgot exclude her from the Facebook post and now here she is, in all of her crazy glory.
Great job, Roger. This is your reminder to be careful when posting Facebook or Instagram photos of your crawfish boil, lest your crazy aunt or uncle show up and start pilfering through the crawfish through the big ones.