Duane “Dog” Chapman was arrested in the Breaux Bridge Walmart parking lot after being accused of stealing a 40lb bag of Ol’ Roy. Sources say that Dog the Bounty Hunter was in town promoting Congressman Clay Higgins for some reason, and Higgins forgot to feed the Dog. Chapman is recovering at a local groomer.
Chapman stated that “hadn’t eaten in days” in at interview with our team at Southern Satire as he grabbed a quick lunch at PetSmart on Ambassador Caffery. He was obviously shaken as Congressman Higgins had left him outside overnight and forgot to feed the poor little guy.
Dog the Bounty Hunter was arrested at the Breaux Bridge Walmart, which was an odd SNAFU because Walmart security could not agree on whether to call the sheriff’s office or animal control. In the end, the sheriff’s office picked up Dog and brought him downtown to be booked (only after Chapman stuffed his pockets full of kibble “for the road.”
Congressman Clay Higgins smoothed things over with authorities, bailed out Dog, and assisted him in recovering from the event by leaving him for a spa day at the local groomers.